Saturday, July 02, 2005

You guys are fucked up


I know this, because I'm vain like to know the kind of people who come to my site. So I installed the statcounter to keep track of you guys.

And I believed that healthy, sane people would get here.

But nooo...

I checked the keywords that some people used in the search engine which lead them here. What did I find?

"Amber chia naked nudity."

I mean, damn. I hate that woman. I hate her skin, her face, her nose, her lips, her hair, her lips, her eyes, her lips her lips her lips can I see somebody else's lips for once? If it was, "amber chia hung maimed blown up ", hell, I'll be cool with you.

But I thought, nah, letting her fans read about how much I hate her is cool. So I let that slide.

Next, after I wrote about the cutest niece in the whole wide world (mine, of course), guess what keywords lead them here?

"cute kid paedophile"

I'll be damned. So some sick bastards come here. And I thought, well, at least I showed them that liking a kid doesn't need to include carnal needs. So I let that slide too.

But then, this happened today:

What the fuck?

captain fuck girls pps?

Who in their right mind would search for that? Is the picture of me fucking, penis going in and out a pussy, hips flexing and thrusting, legs pumping, face screwed up like the girl I'm fucking had belacan then farted turn you on? Does the picture of me doing the PPS girls drive you wild, make you want to wank like silly, screaming oh yesyesyesyesyesyesohyes CAPTAIN! (say my name, baby, say my name)

I mean, yeah, I know I'm sexy and all that *COUGH* *COUGH* but did you seriously think I'd actually post pictures of it, or do a tell all? Not that I've ever did any PPS girls. Non-PPS girls, perhaps. But I do remember this one blog where this girl was complaining about a guy with a small penis but the stamina of a racehorse. Hmm...

Man, whoever you are, who happened to use Google in Turkish (group is Gruplar! Yeni!) you must be one sick freak. BUTBUTBUT if you're a hot woman with a banging body and wouldn't mind explaining it to me over dinner, wine and some, uhm, back massage with baby oil and light ambient music in the background, I might let this slip.

Maybe, just maybe. No guarantees here.


Blogger ice messenger said...

Relax buddy~! We dont mind if you wanna post the pics.

Err... yeah, i mean the pics of... that "say my name, baby, say my name" thing. LOL

7:35 AM  
Blogger ice messenger said...

Is me again. I think you are using FireFox huh? Try to open your blog using IE. Your sidebar has become bttm bar now bcos of the size of the picture.

7:39 AM  
Blogger Captain Carcinogen said...

ice messenger: lol. as much as i know the public wants it, i have to dissappoint u guys this one time. and gee, i didnt notice that the pic just engulfed the side bar.

btw, ur profile pic looks like he's humping something...

8:35 AM  
Blogger eyeris said...

i check my stats as well, and some of the refferals were quite funny.

I've had any number of hits looking for 'how to identify snakes' and ending up at my ten-step 'pick up snake and count its legs' post.

and I've had people googling 'Sexy thai girls' and 'thai uniforms' and ending up at my ramblings about tomyam.


2:11 PM  
Blogger cyber-red said...

yea quite fun reading their searches.. very interesting weird stuff out there

7:40 PM  
Blogger Captain Carcinogen said...

yeah, but damnit man. who would want to search for captain fuck girls pps?

11:06 PM  

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